Sonntag, August 10, 2008

Everybody is pregnant around here

except me...*sobb*
Two of my closes friends will give birth within the next 3-4 weeks, another friend just told us that she'll be having the second baby in febuary, which is when I will be off of medication. I'm a little cranky today for various reasons and I nearly cried. I'm totally happy for all of my friends, some of them had to try very hard to get a baby and they will be awesome parents or are awesome parents but today that was too much. There are days when live just feels unfair.

I know, that I should be gratefull for having healthy nieces, nephews and godchildren and I am in 99,9% but today I'm cranky. I'll be o.k. tomorrow and gratefull but today I'm not. TOmorrow I will feel happy for all of my friends without having to cry. Tomorrow I will plan more handknitted and handsewn gifts (no quilts though) for the babies to come because that is all I can do (plus changing nappies like I did today with my oooh so cute godchild! It was a blessing that she was there and baby Max, so I could get my dose of baby and cuddling today. Otherwise my cat would be cuddled to exhaustion tonight...)

Maybe it's that I can't knit at them moment what makes live harder too. My arm hurts ( I told you, I'm pounting!) and I don't think it's too wise to knit much. I swatched a bit though. And if life gives you lemons: make lemonade!
6 blocks of the quilt of doom got done this weekend. So the total is 55 blocks done, 233 to go! I hope to be at 65 blocks next weekend!


KayB hat gesagt…

Let me give you a virtual hug. Tomorrow will be better, you're right. And next February you're off your meds, so life will be different then (in a positive way, I mean). Hold on... there's always light at the end of the tunnel....

yasmin hat gesagt…

If it helps: I know exactly how you feel.

Tomorrow you *will* be ok, but from time to time it's ok to be not ok!


bockstark.knits hat gesagt…

hugs to you!!!!!

Åsa Bi hat gesagt…

Hey... are you feeling better today?

Hugs from Sweden!

karin hat gesagt…

Beware of the light in the tunnel! It might be a train

Kafka said that or something simular.

Yeah Life sucks sometimes!

nosupermom hat gesagt…

Oh Tini, I only read this entry today but let me hug you nevertheless!

I know exactly how you feel because I felt the same in my first marriage when everyone around me seemed to be haveing babies by the minute and my ex put me off from year to year!

Life sucks sometimes but eventually it gets better (and there will come the day when you have all the children you want and wish you could just throw them against the wall ;-) )


Katrin hat gesagt…

Dear Tini,
I have not been here for some weeks now - your post sounds so sad - and believe me, I know how you feel, trying to cope with the situation of never ever having an own baby because of one of the many infertility reasons.
I know how it hurts if somebody of your closests informs you about being pregnant and you should feel joy for them but you can´t...

But, tomorrow the sun rises again and you will make the best of every day, I am sure!
Best wishes,

Sew Wilde hat gesagt…

Hugs to you! I feel the same way sometimes but the feelings do pass and you will feel better soon.

Marietta hat gesagt…

just catching up and am sending happy thoughts your way - you have only "known" me pretty much since i was pregnant and not the three years before of the hell that it took to get there - we couldn't afford extra measures and we actually gave up the week before i got pregnant - (and i hated each and every one of my friends (secretly of course) that did get pregnant) - soon it will be your turn and all those lovely moms who you doted on will return the love :)